Adoption, Abandonment, and Steve Jobs

There was a lot of coverage in the news last week when one of the greatest visionaries of our time passed away at the rather young age of 56. Of course, we are referring to the co-founder of Apple, Steve Jobs. Even if you are not a fan of the Mac, iPod, iPad, or iPhone, there is no question that Mr. Jobs forever changed the way we use technology in our daily lives. But, like the apple with a missing bite that is the iconic symbol of his business legacy, Mr. Jobs too had a little piece missing from him.

While he was a very private man, we rarely saw his wife or children, there is a personal fact that we do know about him; Mr. Jobs was adopted.  And, while he did have some sort of relationship with his birth mother and sister, he chose (according to the Jobs’ Family) to never meet his birth father. The little we do know about his estrangement from his father comes from that man himself in a tastefully done Wall Street Journal article published a few days after Mr. Jobs’ death.

Abdulfattah “John” Jandali and Joanne Simpson were unmarried graduate students when their baby boy was born in San Francisco in 1955. Ms. Simpson was determined to have her baby adopted by a college educated couple, but when that wasn’t possible she entrusted her child to Clara and Paul Jobs. Ms. Simpson and Mr. Jandali eventually did marry and had a daughter, Mr. Jobs’ sister the novelist Mona Simpson, before splitting up for good.

As an adult, Mr. Jobs sought out his birth mother but not his birth father, and according to Mr. Jandali, it’s because he “abandoned his family.” He continues by remarking that his daughter Mona’s 1993 novel “The Lost Father” was

 “ …her way of venting, and it’s OK. She’s entitled to that. It’s the price to pay for not being there for your child when you’re a father. Even though I don’t see her, I love her dearly.”

So while Mr. Jandali did ‘know’ his daughter, he reportedly didn’t discover that the world-renowned computer genius Steve Jobs was his son until 2005.

Mr. Jandali does own two Apple computers, an iPad, and buys each release of the iPhone as it becomes available. He does claim that an email he sent to Mr. Jobs about six weeks ago was replied to with a simple ‘thank you’, but the Jobs Family says that didn’t happen. It’s unfortunate to know that Mr. Jobs died with seemingly unresolved issues with his birth father, but who knows what Mr. Jobs’ life path would have been if Paul and Clara Jobs had never come into his life. One thing is certain, said Mr. Jandali as he waved his iPhone4, “They produce the best. Steve Jobs was a genius.”

Rest in Peace Steve Jobs

How do I prove desertion?

One may obtain a limited divorce on the ground of “desertion”, which is
sometimes called “abandonment”.  For limited-divorce purposes, desertion
requires that there be an unjustified and deliberate act by one spouse to
abandon the other, either by leaving the residence or by creating an intolerable
condition that forces the other to leave the residence.

One may also obtain an absolute divorce on the ground of “desertion.”  In order to
obtain an absolute divorce on this ground, in addition to the above conditions,
the desertion must exist without interruption for at least one year prior to
filing the complaint for absolute divorce.  Finally, there must be no reasonable
expectation that the parties will reconcile.

I should emphasize that the conduct must be unjustified to constitute desertion.  If one
is justified in leaving or forcing the other out, then such conduct does not constitute
desertion.  Justification must consist either of the existence of another ground
for divorce OR conduct by the other spouse that creates an intolerable living
condition or otherwise renders continuation of the marital relationship
impossible.  Obviously, physical abuse would most likely constitute conduct that
creates an intolerable living condition and that justifies the other party in
leaving or in forcing the other spouse to leave.  Many other examples may also
exist.

In addition, desertion requires the absence of consent of the
party being deserted.  If one spouse consents to the other spouse’s leaving,
than such leaving does not constitute desertion.